I’m a HUGE Martha Beck fan but her article “Dear Me” in the April issue of O Magazine blew even me away!
You know how things other people do can drive you crazy. But when we you look more closely, more honestly you see that the reason it drives you crazy is because you exhibit some of those very same traits.
I’ll leave the fancy jargon to Martha because I still trip over the word “perseverating.” What I will say is that Martha offers an exercise that can provide you with amazing clarity and insight.
The first step is to write a letter (not meant to be sent) to a person you harbor unexpressed negative feelings for. I know this doesn’t sound new, but read on.
Martha encourages getting in touch with your inner judgmental witch with a “B.” At the top of the page write “Dear whoever your person is” and tell them in no uncertain terms what you think about them “in your lowest moments.” Remember, you aren’t sending the letter. So let it rip!
I had fun with it. It felt liberating to get it off my chest. Then I read Martha’s next instruction “cross out the person’s name and insert your own name!” What? YIKES! Ouch! WOWSER!
Now read the letter as if it is written to you. Martha encourages openness and thoughtfulness instead of defensiveness. Um hum.
Surprisingly, the things I thought I was writing to my friend like “you never have time for me but I see you making time for other people. I feel unloved, uncared for and unimportant” turned out to be true about me!
Right now, I find myself not making enough time for the things that matter most to me, to my higher self. With my friend as my mirror, I could see how much pain it’s causing me. BUSTED!!! It's so true that when you point a finger at another person, four fingers point back at you.
Martha’s process has a fourth step and a lot of other brilliant things. To enjoy every wise, wonderful note of Martha’s brilliant insight symphony I encourage you to read her column in April’s O Magazine. It will inspire you to turn things around and see them in a new light!
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Too Much REAL in REALITY
The tragedy and devastation in Japan fills me with love, compassion, and concern for my fellow human travelers. It tugs on my heartstrings and clouds my eyes with tears that spring from my deepest reaches.
With life imitating a horrible disaster film, there’s too much REAL in my REALITY. How do we all quell our feelings of uncertainty and deeply abiding sadness?
We’re “can do” people. Give us a plan, something to do and we’ll happily execute. Fill sandbags, no problem, donate to charities offering aid, sure, anything to lessen our feelings of helplessness.
But today I feel paralyzed, my “can do” and my heart broken.
As I surrender to the tears, I see a news clip showing Japanese people gathered in a shelter preparing food together and helping each other. Doing things that feel “normal” they say gives them a sense of comfort.
Things won’t be “normal” in Japan or anywhere else for a long time. But what we "can do" is help each other and find comfort in the simple things of everyday life. We can share a blog, hold virtual hands and for a precious moment or two feel “normal” again.
With life imitating a horrible disaster film, there’s too much REAL in my REALITY. How do we all quell our feelings of uncertainty and deeply abiding sadness?
We’re “can do” people. Give us a plan, something to do and we’ll happily execute. Fill sandbags, no problem, donate to charities offering aid, sure, anything to lessen our feelings of helplessness.
But today I feel paralyzed, my “can do” and my heart broken.
As I surrender to the tears, I see a news clip showing Japanese people gathered in a shelter preparing food together and helping each other. Doing things that feel “normal” they say gives them a sense of comfort.
Things won’t be “normal” in Japan or anywhere else for a long time. But what we "can do" is help each other and find comfort in the simple things of everyday life. We can share a blog, hold virtual hands and for a precious moment or two feel “normal” again.
Monday, February 14, 2011
TGVDIO - Thank Goodness Valentine’s Day is Over
Don’t get me wrong, I’m crazy in love, emphasis on crazy, with my husband of nearly 31 years but he’s not a gifted gifter.
Days like Valentine’s are usually met with a “deer in the headlights” stare and the “we’re not doing gifts are we” question.
He breathes a sigh of relief when I say no. We didn’t plan it this way, it just sort of evolved and it makes us happy. I’m kind of a particular gal, hey I picked him didn’t I.
Who knows me better than me and who knows what I’d like better than moi! So most of the time, I buy my own gifts.
Yesterday for V-day, I bought myself a new keyboard for my computer and a mouse support. Hey flowers wouldn't died and these gifts will keep on giving and giving. What can I say, I’m practical.
My “love language” is actually quality time and my husband scored big points last weekend by driving me 5 ½ hours to Atlanta for a Manifesting Your Vision seminar. That was truly the most awesome gift and I didn’t even have to wait for a special day to get it. Good thing I remembered to send him that “loving” E-card this morning.
Days like Valentine’s are usually met with a “deer in the headlights” stare and the “we’re not doing gifts are we” question.
He breathes a sigh of relief when I say no. We didn’t plan it this way, it just sort of evolved and it makes us happy. I’m kind of a particular gal, hey I picked him didn’t I.
Who knows me better than me and who knows what I’d like better than moi! So most of the time, I buy my own gifts.
Yesterday for V-day, I bought myself a new keyboard for my computer and a mouse support. Hey flowers wouldn't died and these gifts will keep on giving and giving. What can I say, I’m practical.
My “love language” is actually quality time and my husband scored big points last weekend by driving me 5 ½ hours to Atlanta for a Manifesting Your Vision seminar. That was truly the most awesome gift and I didn’t even have to wait for a special day to get it. Good thing I remembered to send him that “loving” E-card this morning.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Today I Paid Attention
To a world that supports me. To a life that blesses me. To the freedom I experience every day to choose how I show up in the world.
Today I paid attention.
To the love sent my way. To joys meant for me. To the life I create for myself in this moment.
Today I paid attention.
To a seeker’s notice of clandestine hopes clamoring at my fringes. To the dreams half obscured in the shadows. To my heart wishes now fully invited to the party.
Today, I paid attention to all that is me. And I was happy, full, filled, complete and overflowing with love.
Today, I paid attention and it totally PAID OFF!
Today I paid attention.
To the love sent my way. To joys meant for me. To the life I create for myself in this moment.
Today I paid attention.
To a seeker’s notice of clandestine hopes clamoring at my fringes. To the dreams half obscured in the shadows. To my heart wishes now fully invited to the party.
Today, I paid attention to all that is me. And I was happy, full, filled, complete and overflowing with love.
Today, I paid attention and it totally PAID OFF!
Monday, February 7, 2011
Let the L♥vefest Begin!
Unconditional love is life’s greatest gift. Everyone wants to give and receive it, but not everyone can because unconditional love begins at home. To give it to someone else you must first have it for yourself. Like the airplane safety announcement you have to put on your oxygen mask first before assisting others.
I know from my own learning and experience how important it is to treat ourselves with kindness, compassion, acceptance, and love. It’s not always easy or something we do naturally. But we need to learn how to give this amazing gift to ourselves.
My February Focus Phrase™ session INSPIRE LOVE starts today. For three weeks, I provide a daily phrase to help you explore your relationship with the most important person in your life, YOU!
Briefly, how the process works is that you FOCUS on the phrase during your day and then write three short paragraphs about how the phrase worked in your day. More “how to” information is available in my LIVE YOUR DREAM community. It’s FOCUS + PHRASE + WRITING + FEEDBACK.
If you’d like to write the first phrase with us and email it to me at caren.albers@gmail.com, I’ll be happy to offer you some heartfelt feedback. Here’s our first phrase. “Appreciate and embrace your past as your most cherished teacher.” – Mary Anne Radmacher
LET THE LOVING AND EXPLORING AND WRITING BEGIN!
LIVE YOUR DREAM
I know from my own learning and experience how important it is to treat ourselves with kindness, compassion, acceptance, and love. It’s not always easy or something we do naturally. But we need to learn how to give this amazing gift to ourselves.
My February Focus Phrase™ session INSPIRE LOVE starts today. For three weeks, I provide a daily phrase to help you explore your relationship with the most important person in your life, YOU!
Briefly, how the process works is that you FOCUS on the phrase during your day and then write three short paragraphs about how the phrase worked in your day. More “how to” information is available in my LIVE YOUR DREAM community. It’s FOCUS + PHRASE + WRITING + FEEDBACK.
If you’d like to write the first phrase with us and email it to me at caren.albers@gmail.com, I’ll be happy to offer you some heartfelt feedback. Here’s our first phrase. “Appreciate and embrace your past as your most cherished teacher.” – Mary Anne Radmacher
LET THE LOVING AND EXPLORING AND WRITING BEGIN!
Friday, February 4, 2011
Fun is the Pathway to a Successful Life
"Having fun is not a diversion from a successful life; it is the pathway to it." Martha Beck
My quest for fun today involved a little “retail therapy.” I haven’t done much of it lately. Maybe that’s why it felt so good. The weather spit rain in my face all day long and the clouds threatened to bring an end to daylight as I know it. It felt like Alaska when they have 24 hours of darkness or is it 24 hours of daylight? I really should have paid more attention in school. My sixteen hour marathon website update had the pain in my shoulder screaming “don’t you even think about touching a keyboard.” No computing!!! What else could I do, I had to leave the house.
I headed out searching for a ray of sunshine and found one buying tickets to our local Library’s weekend event “Books Alive- Festival of Reading.” The events includes author presentations, book signings, a luncheon with Keynote Speaker Carl Hiaasen who wrote Hoot, Basket Case, Sick Puppy, Lucky You, Double Whammy, and on and on. I’m quite a fan of his books. All that topped off with a Saturday night, cocktail attire, Literary Gala , who can resist a gala!
Learning my way around my new small town I made a few wrong turns before finding the downtown library. I detoured on my way back taking a small street I had never driven down before. My eyes brightened as I saw some small artsy shops and heard them calling my name. Today’s diversion was so much fun and so successful that I almost forgot it was raining.
My quest for fun today involved a little “retail therapy.” I haven’t done much of it lately. Maybe that’s why it felt so good. The weather spit rain in my face all day long and the clouds threatened to bring an end to daylight as I know it. It felt like Alaska when they have 24 hours of darkness or is it 24 hours of daylight? I really should have paid more attention in school. My sixteen hour marathon website update had the pain in my shoulder screaming “don’t you even think about touching a keyboard.” No computing!!! What else could I do, I had to leave the house.
I headed out searching for a ray of sunshine and found one buying tickets to our local Library’s weekend event “Books Alive- Festival of Reading.” The events includes author presentations, book signings, a luncheon with Keynote Speaker Carl Hiaasen who wrote Hoot, Basket Case, Sick Puppy, Lucky You, Double Whammy, and on and on. I’m quite a fan of his books. All that topped off with a Saturday night, cocktail attire, Literary Gala , who can resist a gala!
Learning my way around my new small town I made a few wrong turns before finding the downtown library. I detoured on my way back taking a small street I had never driven down before. My eyes brightened as I saw some small artsy shops and heard them calling my name. Today’s diversion was so much fun and so successful that I almost forgot it was raining.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Casting a Long Shadow
For once I’m happy the sun wasn’t out today! Both NY and Penn. groundhogs agree, no shadow, spring is around the corner!
If you want to get a jump on things and warm up now, watch Oprah’s Australian Adventure with her 300 ultimate viewers.
It doesn't get more “feel-goodie” than seeing the astounding beauty of the Australian sights or watching people receive this amazing trip of a lifetime.
Oprah ask her guests to remember that great things can happen in your life, go home hold this experience in your heart, and then release it into the world.
No matter what you think of Oprah or her grand gestures or the commercialization of her good deeds or my personal pet peeve that she bellows things out in threes. It does my heart good to know that there are three hundred people who will be paying it forward and raising the vibrational frequency of the world’s energy.
That’s a positive outcome no matter how you slice it.
If you want to get a jump on things and warm up now, watch Oprah’s Australian Adventure with her 300 ultimate viewers.
It doesn't get more “feel-goodie” than seeing the astounding beauty of the Australian sights or watching people receive this amazing trip of a lifetime.
Oprah ask her guests to remember that great things can happen in your life, go home hold this experience in your heart, and then release it into the world.
No matter what you think of Oprah or her grand gestures or the commercialization of her good deeds or my personal pet peeve that she bellows things out in threes. It does my heart good to know that there are three hundred people who will be paying it forward and raising the vibrational frequency of the world’s energy.
That’s a positive outcome no matter how you slice it.
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