Gratitude for Life

Lately on my morning walks, I’ve seen several lifeless monarch butterfly bodies scattered on the ground. My first reaction is sadness but then I realize everything has lifecycle, an expiration date, including me.

I often wonder if given the chance to know my own lifecycle, would I take it? My answer is always a resounding yes.

My practical side wants to know how long my money needs to last. If only until tomorrow, today could be a really “bang up” day! But more than that I think about how I would spend my last day.

I would swing on every swing, kiss everyone I love probably even some that I didn’t, forgive everyone for everything real or imagined, reverently stare at the deep blue sky and not miss a moment of magic of that day.

A butterfly flits by me dancing in the sky and on her wings I send a prayer for the best day of her life, telling her to wait for nothing, to live this day and love this day to the fullest, to embrace every moment aware and grateful for the gift of her life.


LIVE YOUR DREAM

Small Changes in Thinking CAN Make Big Changes in YOU

The Four Day Win (oops I added an “e”and typed wine the first time) is a behavior modification strategy shared with me by Martha Beck Master Life Coach Susan Hyatt shyatt.com.  It nurtures goal setting and I can sure use some help with that?

The process involves setting a four day goal and turning it into a success, a win. You start by choosing a small daily goal that you will commit to doing for four day.  A feasible goal makes a huge difference in succeeding.  So, make your goal, then cut it in half to make it ridiculously easy to achieve. I cut my original goal to write one hour every morning during my genius hours when I'm most creative, productive, and connected down to thirty minutes.

Step two involves giving yourself a small reward every day you achieve your goal.  I put together a basket of small gifts,  material rewards (pens, post-it, nail polish etc.), and post-it notes with nonmaterial rewards like reading for 1/2 hour from a yummy book or watching Oprah. I gotta say the reward part challenges me. But that’s the applause, the pat on the back, the “atta girl” we all crave.

On the fourth day of achieving your goal give yourself a BIGGER reward because you accomplished your Four Day Win. It doesn’t need to be expensive like an e-reader or an ipad (although I’m trying to manifest one) it can be a latte or trip to the park or something else that you like.

Three small rewards followed by a larger one allows you to experience life in small wins.  It breaks goals up into managable bites and creates a natural pause to relax in and enjoy your successes.  Then if you want, you can set another Four Day Win! 

It also provides a psychological boost.  Say I go to a yoga class one time, “I’m trying yoga.” But if I go to yoga four times “I DO Yoga.” See the shift, BE the shift!

LIVE YOUR DREAM

Blog Writing 101

The IDEA, EXECUTION, and PUBLISH POST button are three important elements to consider when writing a blog post. Each can terrify a beginner. But trust me you can do this.

IDEA - write about something you believe in that excites you. Something you are experiencing right now or something that you can’t get out of your mind translate well into blog posts that engage readers.

EXECUTION – short and simple is best. A three paragraph writing style similar to one I use in my Focus Phrase Process is a great structure for new bloggers to loosely follow. I say "loosely" because you may notice that this post does not conform to that style.☺ Also, remember to edit, edit, edit. Ask yourself “is this word, thought, or sentence necessary to tell the story?” If not, no matter how brilliant, lose it.

PUBLISH POST - clicking the publish post button used to paralyze me, but practice does make easier (remember there is no perfect). So NIKE (just do it!) You can always change, edit, or if you totally freak out delete it altogether. Nothing is carved in stone here, RELAX, hit PUBLISH POST and see what happens.

My guess is you will find many who appreciate your message and identify with you. Martha Beck calls them “your people.” Don’t let fear keep you on the sidelines another minute. Put yourself out there, BLOG, find “your people” and start building a tribe.

I’m hitting PUBLISH POST now!☺

LIVE YOUR DREAM

My Superpower

My secret superpower is survival, surviving conflicting feelings, surviving difficult life situations, surviving sometimes what it feels like to be in this moment.

My tongue-in-cheek not-so-secret superpower is sleeping. I can fall asleep within minutes of going to bed and begin dreaming right away. I know this because the “others” that share my bed, a.k.a husband of thirty years, gets tired of my startle response, sleep paralysis and screams of terror when he comes to bed. Not my fault. The dream train came around and I jumped right on.

Just last weekend waiting in an interminable line at the airport to check my luggage I struck up a conversation with a woman who sells medical equipment to monitor sleep. She informed me that falling right asleep, dreaming right away etc. are all signs of Narcolepsy. At least that what I think she said, I kinda nodded off!

Seriously, don’t let the opinions of others cause you to believe that there is something wrong with you or your superpower. Sleep serves as one of the most important restorative processes. Like air, you sure do suffer when you don't have it. So sleep well my friends because the world needs our strength to evolve and survive.

Dig deep, tell me what superpower do you posses that will help us save the world? Share freely, there are no wrong answers in my class!
LIVE YOUR DREAM

Learning to Fly

Butterflies sound so much prettier than how a nervous stomach feels

It’s RISE week and after that I fly to Phoenix for a Writer’s Retreat with Martha Beck. YIKES!

It’s usually after the sun goes down, that I start question myself “Am I ready? Can I do this?” The questions quickly turn to doubts and that’s when the party really gets started.

But experience has taught me that after dark fatigue often masquerades as doubt. So I say to the questioner and the doubter “I’ll talk to you in the morning.” Because nine times out of ten when the light of day arrives, they are gone.

So let's bask in the light. Learn, stretch, grow, and accept the butterflies as a sign of the metamorphosis that occurs as we leave the safety of our cocoons and learn to fly.

“A JOURNEY OF WORDS"- Discover the wisdom of your own words.

Are you ready to take the next BIG step toward living your dream?

Want to understand yourself better and find more meaning and direction in your life? We create our WORLD with our WORDS. Our thoughts become things. When we tell ourselves we can, we can and when we tell ourselves we can’t, well you know how that usually goes.

The words we use every day get strung together and become the fabric of the stories of our lives. Want your life’s journey to be a beautiful tapestry worthy of you? Join me, Caren4u in an online writing experience focusing on the wisdom of your own words.

Mary Anne Radmacher’s thought-provoking, inspiring words (Radmacher Focus Phrases™) begin a conversation that leads to exploration and discovery. Even if you don’t feel like an accomplished writer this class is for you. It's about so much more than writing. Write to inspire your inner strength. Write to develop a habit of using your own words to keep you focused and aimed in the direction of your dreams.

Focus Phrase writing is a small investment with huge returns. While it is about writing it is more about what you discover as you explore and write. The insight gained doesn’t end when the class ends, it lasts a lifetime.

This is a guided writing process conducted online. I offer feedback unique and specific to your writing and discovery. Encouragement and support, no extra charge, that’s just how I roll!

A JOURNEY OF WORDS begins on June 7th and concludes June 25th. $129 covers three consecutive weeks of writing Monday – Friday. Ready to enroll? Reply to caren4u@comcast.net and I will get you registered and paid.

Want a shorter class, I offer A JOG OF WORDS. $40 covers a one week preview that introduces you to the Focus Phrase writing process. At the end of the week, you can decide to continue on with me or enjoy having participated in the shorter class experience.

Here’s what some of my participants have to share about the process:

“This turned out to be a wonderful opportunity to prod my inner wisdom and to actually allow myself to creatively explore beyond the obvious. I found this to be freeing and exciting.” Anne M.

“I imagined this course would get me thinking about life choices big and small, and help me focus on my needs, but I didn't know that some choices would become very important and very clear. I've been able to set my priorities and complete some challenges that have enriched my life in marvelous and unexpected ways.” Michelle A.

Live Your Dream - http://carenalbersinspirations.com

Turn a Rut into a Groove

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the dimensions (Ellen Glasgow). You can get out of a rut but you can’t get out of a grave that is for sure. But changing a rut into a groove, now that’s a whole other animal.

Last year my husband and I were trying to decide whether to ship one of our cars to Florida where our son and his family live. On our longer visits rentals were very expensive but we we didn't want to increase our carbon footprint by buying a third car to keep down there (tree-hugger I know).

We weighed the pros and cons. Half the time my car sat in the garage and the other half I knew could plan more efficiently. Plus, I have a bike and legs that I have been meaning to use more.

This idea met with skepticism from our well-meaning friends and family who couldn’t imagine EVER being without a car. But it has worked out wonderfully and has even brought us closer together. In the year that we've been car sharing only a couple of conflicts occurred that were easily remedied.

Changing this rut into a groove brought unexpected benefits. When I want the car during the day, I chauffeur my husband the short three miles to work. My friend is encouraging me to get a cap!

In the car, we are present with each other and connect in a way that we hadn’t been after 30 years of marriage. We now plan our weeks together and engage more in each other’s days. One our short commute, we talk about our work, our days, our dreams and encourage and support each other.

The car thing may not work for everyone, but I encourage you to pick something that you’ve always done a certain way and turn it upside down. Play with changing some aspect of your life and I’ll bet you will find hidden benefits, too.

My new groove has me walking more and has brought us closer together and renewed our connection. It taught me that “LESS can be the new MORE!”

Faith and Hope

The wind blows softly, gently at my back as I ready to pull anchor and hoist my sail, next stop New Orleans. Today, the winding down begins, the remembering of what to take, the necessities and luxuries to make our next stop MOST enjoyable. Risking sacrilege, I’ll call next week a holy week, two birthdays and one wedding anniversary in the span of five days. Glory be!

Soon, we'll be on the road again navigating a charmed life, a good life for which I am appreciative and grateful beyond measure. My roadmap to inner peace had some twists and turns, surprises and incomplete data, but I didn’t let that deter me. Faith pointed the way and I followed. Life doesn’t come with an instruction manual or a guarantee. We have to show up and do our part and keep doing it.

Experiencing a good life is like adjusting the knob on a toaster. No matter how careful we are sometimes it comes out too dark and sometimes too light, but we don’t stop eating toast. We keep tweaking the dial in the hope that THIS will be the time it turns out a perfectly golden brown color swimming in butter. That's what keeps us going.

Perfecting Imperfection

I’m tripping today. I can’t locate my enthusiasm, my mental energy must have taken a personal day, and my spunkiness apparently left early on its own spring break. I’m sick and tired of being accountable. “Calgon take me away.”

Sometimes it needs to “good enough” end of story. No excelling at every turn, no accolades for being the best at anything, those extract a heavy price that I am no longer willing to pay. No pedestals from which to topple from.

I can achieve my highest good, which is the best there is in my world, only when I can HONESTLY say to some things “that’s good enuff!”

Spring Break Writing Boot Camp - April 12 - 23

Take an inward journey this Spring Break guided by Caren4u.

Drop and give me ten. Ten days devoted to U! Ten days writing together, listening to your heart, writing what it tells you, and discovering your dreams.

It’s a quick-start, jumpstart, online process using Radmacher Focus Phrase™ writing. Our dreams are heart wishes that too often go unheard in the noise of our daily lives. Spring Break Writing Boot Camp is a chance to focus inward and discover the answers waiting inside of you.

The kids get a Spring Break, why shouldn’t you?

Email me your interest at caren4u@comcast.net and we’ll get you registered for Spring Break on my virtual beach.

NO SUNSCREEN REQUIRED! Class fee $70 carenalbersinspirations.com

Clue Train, Toot Toot

My life is like a crossword puzzle. Some answers fill in quickly others take time to figure out. One across, or over as my mom likes to call it, “what you were born to do?” Easy one, “write.” One down, three letters beginning with “w” “one of you best qualities,” again easy, “wit.”

I sometimes carry a crossword puzzle around for weeks picking it up from time to time, solving it bit by bit, finding even one answer that before eluded me a celebrated victory.

I solve the puzzle of my life in much the same way. Some answers fill easily as other clues are being solved. Others require more time. When only a few obscure clues remain in my crossword puzzle, I reach out to Google. Some call this cheating, I call it research, help in finding my answers.

Google isn't magic, the answers don’t appear just because I type in the clue. What fun would that be? Most times I need to turn a clue upside down, or think of it another way and with a little luck eventually I'll find my answer.

Right now, I’m looking for a plum variety four letters beginning with “GA_ _.” Google, oh Google, where are you? In the crossword of my life, the clue I’m trying to solve is seven letters “having it all.” Could it be “success” “balance” “victory” or something yet to be discovered? I don't think Google can help me with this one.

Cloudy With a Chance of Coughing

I just returned from Urgent Care with a diagnosis of Bronchitis moving into Pneumonia. Two breathing treatments, one cortisone shot, one antibiotic, one prescription cough medication, and an inhaler later, I’m hoping to feel REAL GOOD soon!

Five Signs Caren is REALLY, REALLY Sick!

1. Personal grooming slides – Hair unwashed for six days smashed and matted to the back of my head in a circular pattern most commonly seen in nursing home patients (apologizes to nursing home patients).

2. Nightly crying jags – Things are so dismal after 10 pm. I know I’m not right but I can’t figure out how to make me right. So I cry. It actually makes me feel better.

3. Loss of appetite – Can be seen as a blessing or a curse. But the kicker is that nothing tastes right. That might not have stopped me in the past, but it now gives me pause. I’m simply not hungry, must be the meds.

4. Canceling social engagements – I had to un-invite ten people due to come to my house today for beach house brunch. BUMMER!!!! I not only will miss seeing everyone, I will be eating eggs every day until I return to California.

5. Loss of spunkiness – Not calling people on their crap. It just takes way to much energy.

But there was a glimmer of hope today, after my shot and second breathing treatment Bob was spouting some “wisdom” about decongestants and I said “you don’t know that” to which he replied “Somebody's feeling better.” Touche!

Falling in Love with Yourself is FOREVER

Spend this Valentine’s Day falling in love with YOU. Our relationships with other people can only be as highly evolved as our relationship with ourselves. It’s like a bank account you’ve got to put love in to be able to take love out. So if you find yourself unattached this Valentine Day or even if you are attached consider taking Self-Love 101 at “YOU University” where YOU are the student and the teacher.


SELF-LOVE 101 - Ten surfire ways to master self-love.

1. Acknowledge Yourself - You’re perfect just the way you are right now – not ten pounds from now, not a new job from now, not a different anything from now. Explore, accept, and love the gift that you are just by being you.
   
2. Cast Off Old Tapes – You know the ones. The ones you’ve been hearing since childhood about who you are. Don’t let other people’s opinions define you. Train your mind and spirit to go beyond other people’s limitations.
   
3. Affirmations Work – Find one that encourages acceptance and self-love. Affirmations are like planting seeds. They don’t look like much in the beginning, but if you tend to them they soon grow and blossom. “I love and approve of myself just as I am” is a great one by Louise Hay.
   
4. Send Outdated Beliefs Packing - Your outward experience always reflects your beliefs about yourself. If you want to change the outside; you’ve got to start on the inside.
   
5. L.I.G. Let-It-Go – Forgive yourself for ALL your past transgressions. Like Dr. Phil says “If we knew better, we’d do better.” Wipe your slate clean. Nobody’s perfect. Compassion and forgiveness begins and ends with you.
   
6. Observes Don’t Judge – Judging and criticizing other people also means that we judge and criticize ourselves. That alone is a good reason to give it up. It’s wonderful when you don’t feel the need to label a thing as “good or bad, right or wrong.” When you observe, it just “is.”
   
7. Embrace Change – This version of yourself is not permanent and neither was the one you grew up with. You can change your thoughts about who you are and change who you are.
   
8. Learn & Grow – Look for opportunities to try new things. It makes you and life more interesting. If you’ve always loved a thing but have never tried it, what are you waiting for?
   
9. Breathe – It makes everything better. Relax and take a deep breath. On the inhale say to yourself “I am” and on the exhale say “loving.”
   
10. Practice, Practice, Practice – We think we learn something and then it’s over, “BAM” we know it. But we learn by doing, by repeating a thing, sometimes over and over and over and over.

Applaud your learning and give yourself an "A" just for taking the course. Loving yourself, respecting and appreciating you is the most powerful thing a person can do. When we fall in love with other people they can leave us, but when we fall in love with ourselves, IT'S FOREVER!