AHA Moment

For years, I have proclaimed myself a non procrastinator. But lately there is evidence to the contrary. I’ve been avoiding finishing my website like the plague. I even started painting my walls (which I love and hate all at the same time) to avoid it. I dismissed my lack of action as “just not in the mood yet.”

But today, I figured out what’s stopping me.

My AHA moment came as a result of several things. One, something a friend said about her not being able to promote her own writing. I thought to myself “well if that keeps you from writing anything, you will never have to face that obstacle.” But I didn’t quite see how it applied to me…..until today.

Today when I asked myself again if I was going to work on the website I heard a quiet “probably not,” when I was hoping for a “sure let’s get cracking.” I started contemplating why my quiet “no” was winning. Answers didn’t immediately come, so I decided to listen on the computer to Oprah’s Soul Series for inspiration (sounds like procrastination, but it wasn't).

I listened to Dr. Wayne Dyer talk about his book “Change Your Thoughts Change Your Life.” He remarked that in nature “No tree has branches fool enough to fight each other” and I thought “why am I fighting myself.”

Then I listened to part 3 of Eckhart Tolle on the Soul Series. He talked about the idea that getting comfortable with not knowing allows the knowing to come, and about surrendering our attachment to what an outcome should be.

Contemplating my friend’s statement, Wayne Dyer’s and Eckhart Tolles’ wisdom, I found myself firmly planted in the present moment and to my astonishment my answer came.

Like my friend, I had projected myself into the future thinking about how I would promote the website, what I would do next etc. That unknown seemed so huge that I unconsciously resisted finishing so that I would not have to face it.

It is amazing what can come when we focus on the present moment and accept the information it holds for us. Okay, my new awareness didn’t send me immediately to work on the website. But I had big plans to complete first, a refill for my favorite purple pen, then the website.

If you are still reading this, thanks for sticking it out through this longer than usual post, and best wishes for your own AHA moment.